The one & only child.

I wanna talk to you today about a topic that lingers in the background and haunts me like a group of scary clowns about to do their worst and freak the hell out of me. That topic is being an only child. You see, our dear little miracle child will be an only child for us. It's just the card that God has dealt us & we have made peace with this fact of life. What we struggle with daily is everyone else's perception of being a single child. Sure, it would be lovely for him to have a little play mate to grow up with, someone to fight with about toys, sweets & getting his own way, but it just wasn't meant to be.

I have a brother, Craig has 2 one of which is his identical twin so he knows all too well about how amazing it is to have that sibling bond throughout childhood and taking into adulthood. But me, I have a different experience to being a sibling for you see, I am practically an only child. My parents waited 10 years to have my brother, so by the time my 'baby' brother was able to exercise his right in the sport of sibling rivalry I was out the door and on my way to university. We had the briefest of times growing up together, but where he was obsessed with teenage mutant ninja turtles, I was growing my impressive music collection and collecting GCSE's and A-Levels to start a new life, the first step towards adulthood.

When I look back at my childhood I think about life pre brother. Summers spent in Jersey with my cousin who also was an only child. Summers longing for a sister to play with. Summers waiting for my mum to say "you going to have a brother or sister". I was nine when that summer came and to be frank, although I was beyond excited I knew in my heart that we would have a different relationship to that of normal siblings who are separated by a few years. My brother was, & still is completely an ace kid and I love him to bits but we may as well not be siblings as we were brought up as only children.

I'm getting really apprehensive about all the negative cogitation that is associated with only children. I don't want my son to be influenced by his peers or any other adult about being an only child. It's not negative, there is nothing abnormal about being an only child. Like everything in life it's about balance. Evan will not be 'missing out' because he doesn't have a brother or sister, he will just have a different childhood. Has anyone ever said that children from families with more than 1 child are missing out? missing out on one to one time with both parents, either individually or together as a team.

Are you an only child? Do you have only one child .. how does it work in your family? I'd love to hear what you have to say.

We do all we can to positively promote the idea of being an only child & when he's old enough to understand I will explain to him why he doesn't have any siblings and I hope because he's such a great kid already he'll brush it off and say ... "it's cool mum" - I can but pray.